Winter urges us to schedule more downtime, but the festive season can sweep us into a whirlwind of time-sensitive preparations, social gatherings and the nurturing of our loved ones. Between the office party and taking the family feast out of the oven, self-care can easily be forgotten, and we may wind up feeling overwhelmed.

Many of us are stressed out. According to a 2023 survey by the American Association of Retired Persons, 50 percent of caregivers are burdened emotionally from maintaining the role, and four in 10 caregivers rarely, if ever, feel relaxed. Anational survey conducted by The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center found that 62 percent of parents feel the weight of burnout. Earlier this year, the American Psychological Association revealed in a survey that 57 percent of workers are enduring work-related stress in the form of burnout, anger and emotional exhaustion.

This giving season, remembering family members near and far, as well as service providers, teachers, emergency personnel, nurses and tradespeople, can provide relief (and even a sprinkle of magic) to those that make a meaningful difference in our lives. While sharing holiday joy with others, it is important to also gift ourselves with soothing activities and helpful items to temper holiday stress.

The Gift of Self-Care

“Self-care needs to happen daily—whether meditation, journaling, taking yourself out for a cup of coffee with a book, cooking yourself nourishing food or even dancing to your favorite song in the kitchen,” says Caitlin Ball, a health and lifestyle coach in Zurich, Switzerland. “Sometimes, planning to have no plans is a special treat, especially for those of us that have packed calendars. Even if you’re spending the holidays with family, you don't have to spend every waking minute together, and everyone will be happier if you are happy.” 

Whether we go online to create a curated box of comfort for ourselves or surprise someone with a gift certificate from their favorite yoga studio or nail salon, acknowledging body, mind and spirit can be the ultimate gesture of generosity. “Gifting self-care to someone else is like saying, ‘I see you fully.’ It acknowledges that a person is more than just their day-to-day roles or responsibilities—they have emotional, physical and mental needs,” says Chrissa J. Santoro, senior director of communications at the Omega Institute for Holistic Studies, in Rhinebeck, New York. 

Investing in someone’s peace or transformation outlasts and outshines less thoughtful presents. “Gifting a retreat experience, workshop or wellness service to a loved one is like giving them permission to prioritize themselves—a gift many people hesitate to give themselves, especially after hardship, long work weeks or grief,” Santoro asserts. “These experiences create a space for someone to step away from the stress, noise and demands of daily life, giving them a chance to reset. This kind of thoughtful gift offers not only physical rest, but also emotional renewal, reminding them of their own worth and helping them rebuild strength from the inside out.”

A self-care gift can be as simple as a basket of locally made artisan bread or as life-changing as a personalized therapeutic intervention. “Maybe that holiday gift is a gift certificate to see a coach, a counselor or a therapist,” suggests Paula Forte, an integrative health and wellness coach in Eden Prairie, Minnesota, who specializes in helping caregivers that too often care for others more than themselves.  

Forte spent 45 years working as a registered nurse before becoming her husband’s caregiver when he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. She knows firsthand the downward spiral of self-neglect. Her suggestions for mindful gift-giving include a week of meal delivery service, especially if eating healthy has been a challenge; simple pleasures, such as a canister of fragrant tea or a bouquet of flowers; or a ticket to a botanical garden, inviting the recipient to spend healthful time out in nature. Slipping a gift certificate into a holiday card for prepaid healthy lunches, a pickleball membership or the services of a home organizer might usher in a positive new chapter. 

The Pampered Path 

Since ancient times, people have sought luxurious and therapeutic respite in baths and the use of precious oils and scents. From hot stone massage to aromatherapy spa treatments, today’s bodywork modalities offer something for everyone. Pampering might be seen as a vanity-driven practice, but heading to the nearest spa or salon is a surefire way to boost endorphins that not only improve mood but lower stress hormones such as cortisol, promoting the body’s natural state of homeostasis. A 2020 study published in the journal Scientific Reports found that 10 minutes of massage, as well as simple rest, significantly reduces systemic stress by prompting the nervous system to switch into parasympathetic mode.

Giving someone a pampering experience can be a wonderful way to bring them fully back to all their senses. “A great option is a gift certificate to your favorite spa for a facial or a skincare basket to create that self-care routine at home,” says Diana DePaoli, holistic esthetician, herbalist and owner of Aura+Bloom, in East Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania. “Men need self-care, too. According to my husband, Danny, it is sleep and a good shave, followed up with some extra love for his beard with my chamomile serum.”

DePaoli’s energy facials include tuning-fork sound healing, as well as reiki, an energy-healing modality, combining physical and spiritual restoration in one session. Even à la carte spa treatments like Himalayan-salt massage or foot reflexology does a body and soul good. 

Gifting Kindness, Time and Presence

Making someone’s world light up this holiday season doesn’t need to involve expensive presents. Creating a special music playlist, serving breakfast in bed or inviting a neighbor out to coffee are simple, but lovely, gestures that make a person feel special. “I think coupons for experiences you can do together are very meaningful, and you get to spend quality time together. Maybe a coupon for a day hike and picnic, or a movie night in and you make it special with lots of fun snacks,” recommends Ball, adding, “The older people in our lives just want to hear from us or spend time with us. Give them a coupon saying you will call them once a week.” 

Forte’s low-cost suggestions include “a book of coupons to run errands they simply don’t have time to complete, like taking their kids to a museum or park, returning the purchase that was the wrong size or detailing their car.” For DePaoli, inexpensive but thoughtful gifts can also fill someone’s belly with love. “You can’t go wrong with making someone a homemade meal or dessert,” she quips.

Adopting a Self-Care Mindset 

Self-care is vital during the holidays and beyond. DePaoli says, “Being able to rest and reboot is very important to being able to have the energy and mindset to move forward in anything.” And according to Forte, “Self-care isn’t selfish. It is self-preservation.”

Marlaina Donato is an author, painter and recording artist. Connect at WildflowersandWoodsmoke.com

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